Refactor DOM special cases per tags including controlled fields (#26501)

I use a shared helper when setting properties into a helper whether it's
initial or update.

I moved the special cases per tag to commit phase so we can check it
only once. This also effectively inlines getHostProps which can be done
in a single check per prop key.

The diffProperties operation is simplified to mostly just generating a
plain diff of all properties, generating an update payload. This might
generate a few more entries that are now ignored in the commit phase.
that previously would've been ignored earlier. We could skip this and
just do the whole diff in the commit phase by always scheduling a commit
phase update.

I tested the attribute table (one change documented below) and a few
select DOM fixtures.